Like a Jerry Seinfeld segment, this is much ado about nothing. Which is about what this country is worth if you subtract what we have in assets from what we owe China. The next step in public education is to make learning Chinese mandatory so our children will be prepared when China calls in all the IOUs.

This is nothing to worry about, but what do you think happened to Central Kitsap boys basketball? The Cougars had four of their starters on the all-league team, yet could not seem to finish games. They won eight of their first nine games and then went 8-8 the rest of the way, including losing four of their last five with talent that screams for much more.

The Mariners waited out Ken Griffey Jr. and when he had no other place to turn, he started to warm up to the idea of coming back to Seattle to finish his likely Hall of Fame career. Then just as it seemed like he would sign, Atlanta stepped in and all of a sudden Griffey wasn’t so keen to the idea of returning back to his early baseball roots.

But after a phone call from Hall of Famer Willie Mays, whom Griffey idolizes, Junior decided his legacy with the city of Seattle meant more to him than being closer to his family in Atlanta. It’s nice to learn about somebody who does what is in the heart, even if it did take Willie Mays to make it happen.

Somebody said that Olympic High School’s baseball team could be a state championship caliber team this spring. The Trojans have the talent and the coach (Nate Andrews), now all they need is to avoid getting whatever it is that afflicted CK basketball.

It was suggested the other day that the way to solve the housing foreclosure problem is to reduce mortgage principles by 25 percent, giving homeowners incentive to hold on to their houses and make the payments.

That’s a good idea that is too logical to ever happen. Just as it’s too logical to take all the bailout money and give it in equal doses to all the households in America. Trickle up the money instead of handing it out to the crooks who got this country in trouble in the first place.

Of course, as we all know, when companies get in trouble they never fire the people responsible. Dressed in their finest suits and shoes, they take the guilded elevator down to the basement and fire the janitor.

Or, like school districts do when levies fail, they reach down to the kids with holes in their shoes who find comfort in extracurricular activities and ax all of them out of their comfort zones and send them back to their mean homes.

Put the kids on the streets, that’s the school districts’ mottoes.

Bette Hyde may be the best school superintendent Bremerton ever had, but it is troubling, especially in these economic times she would be paid salary plus her retirement to do the job. Bette could have defused the controversy it stirred by refusing her retirement income. But she did the right thing by moving on to another job, so it all ended up a bunch of nothing about nothing anyway.

On the other hand, Bette isn’t doing what most of us would do. In fact, the first person who refuses extra income that is legal should be nominated for a Noble Prize.

And then tested for stupidity.

There is a stupid test, isn’t there?

Speaking of stupid, I actually rushed home the other day so I could watch the end of the NBA Slam Dunk Contest. What was I thinking? I got to get a life.

When Nate Robinson soared over 6-11 Dwight Howard for his winning dunk, I immediately thought he should be on the US Olympic track and field team. Maybe at 5-3, or however many inches he’s short of six feet, he could win gold in the high jump. He would be inspiration for all those kids knocked out of sports by levy failures, and they might turn to practicing high jump in their backyards instead of getting in trouble on the streets.

Think of all the space in our jails that would create for the real criminals – all the school board members who vote sports out to save the money needed to pay semi-retired superintendents who double-dip.

Has it ever occurred to you how important coaches are in basketball? Take North Mason. They have three coaches – Larry Skogstad, Al Gleich, Howard Thoemke – whose combined victories surpass 1,000. With that kind of experience at work, the Bulldogs still lost three games. You would think that nobody could touch them, wouldn’t you?

Of course, as we all know, good players make good coaches. Let me coach in their prime Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, Wilt Chamberlain and Elgin Baylor on a team and I don’t think I would lose too many games in the Bremerton City League at Sheridan Park.

Maybe one or two.

But that’s just me.

Which reminds me how great a golfer I was. If there were woods on the course, I found them. If there was water, I found it. If there was a mole hole, my ball disappeared in it.

However, the mole hole had to be in the woods near water.

If there was no way you could lose a ball on a particular golf course, I lost not just one ball, but several. In fact, I have lost balls in the middle of the fairway.

How the balls got in the middle of the fairway is a deeper mystery than them getting lost.

Should golf ever change its rules and give bonus points for shortest drives off a tee, they would name the bonus system after me. I don’t know how many 10-foot drives I have hit in my short-lived golfing career. Even then, like Lenny Randle, I had to blow on the ball to get that distance.

My playing partners often cleared out when I stepped to the tee. Even standing behind me was a dangerous thrill.

But, hey, nobody ever got killed playing golf with me.

Not, that I know of.

Once, back in the early 1970s I played in a company golf tournament in Snohomish and I was so bad I was certain they would boo me at the 19th hole. Instead, I discovered that under the Calloway golf format we were playing, I had played so bad that I actually won. In fact, I won so many prizes they decided to disqualify me from some of them so others could get some prizes.

Did you read the Sports Illustrated story on Casey Martin’s buddy who turned from golf to playing online poker and has made millions? The guy plays multiple hands at once, which seems improbable if not impossible. I guess it’s like playing 40 or 50 bingo cards at once, but more stressful, I’m sure.

But I don’t advocate poker playing. I think it’s destructive. I’ve seen good friends in the past get addicted to it and lose and lose and lose. Their Friday paychecks used to get eaten up pretty quick at various Whatcom County card rooms. I thought it was stupid then, and is stupid now.

However, I did become a pretty good Pinochle cutthroat player during my college days. I made my recreational money playing it. Some of my friends got so angry with me winning all the time they refused to play.

Now, when I play against Mary and a dummy hand, she often beats me. Time has beaten me down, I guess.

There is a reason why gambling is not a good idea, not that it stops us from doing it. But if you stop and think about it, all the tall buildings in Lost Wages were built on the money lost there.

The reason for the spread of Indian casinos is we are a society of gamblers. They build them and we come.

Whenever I hear people talk about going to Lost Wages, I usually hear the words, “I’ve got a thousand dollars to lose.” When I hear that, I respond by saying, “I’ve got a deal for you. Leave half of your money with me and when you get back, I’ll give half of it back. That way you will only lose $500 and when you get home you’ll get $250.”

I’ve yet to get a taker.

Nothing, it seems, is better than $250.

Have a great month.

You are loved.